habits

The Germans arrive today. Who and what you ask. I can't really say. I'm not even sure I have ever been told their names, but they are coming. Somehow a couple of film or something students have found Steve as they were planning their trip to SA. As he is not in Mogadishu right now (as he was supposed to be), he is going to help them navigate their way through to where they are staying. Up until I went to bed last night, this was not even an issue. Sure they aren't American, but they are short term-short distance friends. In other words strangers who need some assistance.

These people have always been my friends. In high school it was the exchange students. In between being the stranger myself after graduation, I had a steady stream of these people in my life. These are people I know are going to leave, but for some reason, I take the time anyhow. In fact, the most recent departure of a new American stranger damn near broke my heart. (Love you Mitra!) And still I persist. It might be because my mom taught me about tolerance without me even realising it (which she did). But I think now its more because I know what being the stranger is all about. And Jo'burg is a hard place to be a stranger in. Its big, its spread out and with the persistent cloud of fear everyone lives in, its hard to make friends when you don't even have a starting base. Look, I had that base, and I still struggle with a lack of friends. But then I end by missing my short term-short distance friends and feeling both enriched and empty - and I do it again. And this time around, it is the Germans.

Still, this was not a problem. Some habits are hard to break and I'm not even worried about this one. Last night, minutes before bed, Steve said, "are we inviting them over for dinner or going to the bowling club or what? Oh, and Roger will probably be with us..." This doesn't sould like an issue to anyone does it. The problem is this. I spent the whole of Saturday preparing and freezing meals for the next two weeks. I have a schedule. I even have the following two weeks planned out and the groceries ordered for that cooking spree. Deviations are allowed for, I never reheat fish dishes. So if we want to eat fish, it gets purchased that day, and the allocated meal gets pushed to another date. I rearrange my calendar and life moves on. Last night when the crisis struck, I was advocating for eating at home. This is due to the fact that we are poor and that Steve and I already have two commitments later this week, and the boys go all loopy when we are both out of the house in the evenings. Now I wonder if the cabbage rolls with a side of mashed baby new potatoes will be sufficient and tasty enough. I wonder if I should swop it out for something else.

And last night, I went to bed worrying that they might be vegetarian. What then? A last minute dash to the grocery store to prepare some tried and successful vegetarian dishes? But that would really screw up the system, because then, I will have extra of what is already ordered and less of things I haven't ordered because we still have plenty. Its a little dilemma, I'm sure, but nonetheless, it is my dilemma. And if good habits die hard, the bad ones NEVER seem to go away. And as female and topped off by being mother, I worry. You'll only notice, if you watch me long enough, but it is there. But I have to play this all by ear and sit at work, impotent to do anything, should they be vegetarians or not. Fortunately, my business direction skills seem to have refined themselves over the years and I can act in a crises situation (which this is not), so I'm hoping this will all go smoothly. And what for you ask. Because I keep putting myself out there to make friends I will have to say goodbye to sooner rather than later.